Are you a loser?

Closeup portrait angry young Unhappy boy, young student displaying Loser Sign on forehead, pointing at you with disgust isolated grey wall background. Negative human emotion, expression Body LanguageAre you a loser? That seems like a pretty provocative question. It might catch you off guard if someone asked you that. It’s not your typical question.

Chances are pretty good you’d say no even if someone asked you. No, you’re not a loser. After all, who wants to think of themselves as losers? People do their best to feel good about themselves regardless of reality, regardless of actual decisions and choices they make, regardless of the outcomes they’re getting in life.

And yet, day after day, year after year, people lose, lose, and lose.

They focus on the negative and let pessimism drag them down. They criticize, blame, gossip, and judge harshly. They assign responsibility for their own lives to someone else. They have a loser attitude that’s highlighted by pettiness, superficiality, self-pity, and whining. They see the glass as half empty, if not bone dry.

And that was me.

I was expert at kidding myself about who I was. I was great at self-pity and blaming others for how my life turned out. A simple loss could turn into a near tragedy because of the way I looked at it, and I wanted to give up almost instantly.

I had a lousy attitude.

I was a loser.

All of this changed as I started to adopt the No-Lose Model.

I finally realized that my life was a result of all the choices I made and, paramount among them, the way I choose to look at the events that happened around me.

I decided that no matter what path I took in life, I would work on finding the positive in it: a positive outcome, a positive lesson, a positive relationship, whatever.

Yes, the world can be a harsh place. Yes, bad things can happen to us. Yes, we may experience pain down to our bones.

But we always have a choice. We get to decide what it means. We get to decide whether to react or to respond. We get to decide if we’re going to focus on the negative or the positive.

What are you going to decide?

Get the Nerve!

About Joe Serio

Dr. Joe Serio is a keynote speaker, trainer, and author who helps the people in your organization navigate resistance to change so they can move forward successfully.

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